The Tissue Issue

Yes... this is the amazing title that is supposed to be clever and witty and stirring. Oh stop laughing....


Ahh, tissue... It's an important issue many of us tend to overlook and not pay sufficient attention to. How might it be important to you? Basically, tissue serves to give a very generic description of you: your level of hygience. Tissue can be used to dab dry your perspiration under a hot sun, or to wipe your mouth after laksa, or even to pick up that accidental poo on the floor courtesy of your pet maltese.

And what about all the embarrassing moments the tissue has rescued us from? Recall that everytime there is a piece of tissue in sight, something awkward has usually taken place, such as noses being picked. That pair of red lips from eating too much chilli? That rebel of a nose that churns out endless streams of mucus? Without help from the tissue, one shudders to think what the girl/guy of your dream sitting opposite you would think or react.

You would think that a commodity with such high demand, and wide variety of uses, should rightfully be expensive and low in supply. Should it not enjoy the same status as cosmetics? But no. Tissue comes very cheaply in small convenient packets thoughtfully designed for slim storage in handbags and pockets. Some even come scented so that people might enjoy the fragrance they like. Often, instead of being appreciative, we in fact tend to misuse tissue. How many times have we reached out, grabbed a piece of tissue just to dry our hands, and then dispose of it? So the next time you want to throw away a piece of tissue, take a good look at it. Have you used it thoroughly? Folded and turned over time and again and used until the whole piece is either filled with chilli, mucus, or sweat? Ideally we should, because trees died so that tissue may be available to us.